I
met my future husband during my freshman year in college. He actually happened to be my neighbor,
although I had never seen him in almost two years since he and his family had
moved into the neighborhood. What
started off as a casual friendship soon bloomed into love. Being born and raised in the Indian culture,
it just wasn’t the right thing for a girl to have a boyfriend. To keep the relationship under wraps was
probably one of the hardest things I have done, thanks to the prying eyes of
neighbors, ‘well-wishers’ and almost the whole community! We got to meet rarely as he was living in a
different city, had no phones to continue a conversation, and yet, there was no
doubt in our minds that we were destined to be with each other. I have to be honest in saying that I had not
really prayed about this relationship as it was way too early for me to start
praying for a husband. But in
retrospect, I know that the Lord had chosen my husband for me and in His grace,
blessed me with a man who was not only my best friend, but my partner for
life. He had it planned long ago!
I
was raised in a Christian home, where my parents were fairly broad minded and
were not averse to the idea of a love marriage, which was not the norm. I have to commend my parents for that. In our culture, we fell in love to get
married. The dating concept did not
exist. When you realize you are in love,
it usually culminates in marriage. There
were no fears at all of whether the boyfriend would propose to her and ask her
hand in marriage. Of course that did not
stop breakups and heartbreaks! But
predominantly, it was assumed by everyone that if you are in love, you marry
that person. Usually, if a relationship
did not see the light of marriage, it was because of parental opposition and
societal pressure.
Since
my parents knew about the relationship I was in, when I completed my degree, my
husband’s family was invited over to formally ask my hand in marriage for their
son. We were married on May 28, 1987 and
28 years later, I can definitely say that my husband was the best thing that
has happened to me. We are blessed with
two beautiful daughters, one great son-in-law and an adorable year old
grandson. They say life is not a bed of
roses, nor is ours. We have had our
share of ups and downs, highs and lows, good days and bad days, but through it
all, we have never failed to see the hand of God in our lives. We dedicated our lives and marriage to the
Lord and He has been the head of our family.
Divorce or separation was not even a consideration. Yes, we have had arguments and disagreements,
but still I can surely say that my children have never had to worry even once
if their parents would separate. I
regret for some of the silly fights we’ve had for no particular reason, that we
had blown far out of proportion. While
they did not serve any purpose to us or to the family, reconciliation was
always extra sweet. That was the best
part!! I love the times when we would
laugh at the silly and stupid fights we’ve had.
No
marriage is perfect, and ours isn’t either.
Even 28 years later, we still have a lot to learn from each other and
also about each other. I have my utmost
respect and love for my husband, as he is my friend, mentor, companion and
Pastor. He makes me laugh, and at the
same time gives me a strong sense of security. We enjoy spending time together
with the Lord, worshipping Him, singing praises to Him and studying the Word of
God together. That is the key to our
marriage and to our relationship. But we also enjoy laughing together, and we
do that a lot!
The
promise that we had from the Lord right after we were married is, “My grace is
sufficient for you”. He has never failed
to keep His promise.
If
I have to relive my life again, there are a million things I would like to
change. But I would keep my
husband. After all, it was He who had
destined for us to be together for eternity.
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